Obama Campaign - "If I Wanted America To Fail"

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Daily Devotions

WISDOM

If you support our national security issues, you may love and appreciate the United States of America, our Constitution with its’ freedoms, and our American flag.

If you support and practice our fiscal issues, you may value worldly possessions.

If you support and value our social issues, you may love Judeo-Christian values.

If you support and practice all these values, that is all good; an insignia of “Wisdom” . - Oscar Y. Harward

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

ConservativeChristianRepublican-Report - 20100310

Motivational-Inspirational-Historical-Educational-Political-Enjoyable

Promoting "God's Holy Values and American Freedoms"!



"Sen. Jim DeMint"

DEMINT: White House land grab by Sen. Jim DeMint

http://m.washingtontimes.com/news/2010/mar/02/white-house-land-grab/

You'd think the Obama administration is busy enough controlling the banks, insurance companies and automakers, but thanks to whistleblowers at the Department of the Interior, we now learn they're planning to increase their control over energy-rich land in the West.

A secret administration memo has surfaced revealing plans for the federal government to seize more than 10 million acres from Montana to New Mexico, halting job- creating activities like ranching, forestry, mining and energy development. Worse, this land grab would dry up tax revenue that's essential for funding schools, firehouses and community centers.

President Obama could enact the plans in this memo with just the stroke of a pen, without any input from the communities affected by it.

At a time when our national unemployment rate is 9.7 percent, it is unbelievable anyone would be looking to stop job-creating energy enterprises, yet that's exactly what's happening.

TWT RELATED STORIES:
• Lawmakers cry 'jobs' to push through bills
• Bunning relents; jobless bill passes
• Obama considers GOP health bill input
• Supreme Court appears set to widen gun rights
• D.C. issues first gay-marriage licenses

The document lists 14 properties that, according to the document, "might be good candidates" for Mr. Obama to nab through presidential proclamation. Apparently, Washington bureaucrats believe it's more important to preserve grass and rocks for birdwatchers and backpackers than to keep these local economies thriving.

Administration officials claim the document is merely the product of a brainstorming session, but anyone who reads this memo can see that it is a wish list for the environmentalist left. It discusses, in detail, what kinds of animal populations would benefit from limiting human activity in those areas.

The 21-page document, marked "Internal Draft-NOT FOR RELEASE," names 14 different lands Mr. Obama could completely close for development by unilaterally designating them as "monuments" under the 1906 Antiquities Act.

It says all kinds of animals would be better off by doing so, like the coyotes, badgers, grouse, chickens and lizards. But giving the chickens more room to roost is no reason for the government to override states' rights.

Rep. Robert Bishop, Utah Republican, made the memo public because he didn't want another unilateral land grab by the White House, like what happened under former Presidents Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter.

Using the Antiquities Act, President Carter locked up more land than any other president had before him, taking more than 50 million acres in Alaska despite strong opposition from the state.

President Clinton used the authority 22 times to prohibit hunting, recreational vehicles, mining, forestry and even grazing in 5.9 million acres scattered around the country. The law allowed him to single-handedly create 19 new national monuments and expand three others without consulting anyone.

One of the monuments President Clinton created was the Grande Staircase-Escalante in Utah, where 135,000 acres of land were leased for oil and gas and about 65,000 barrels of oil were produced each year from five active wells. But, President Clinton put an end to developing those resources.

President Obama could do the same in other energy-rich places unless Congress takes action. At least 13.5 million acres are already on his Department of Interior's real estate shopping list.

This includes a 58,000-acre area in New Mexico. The memo said this should be done so the lesser prairie chicken and the sand dune lizard will be better protected. Are these animals going extinct? No. The bureaucrats wrote that the land should be locked up to "avoid the necessity of listing either of these species as threatened or endangered."

In Nevada, the Obama administration might make another monument in the Heart of the Great Basin because it, supposedly, is a "center of climate change scientific research."

In Colorado, the government is considering designating the Vermillion Basin as a monument because it is "currently under the threat of oil and gas development."

Americans should be wary of any plans a president has to seize land from the states without their consent. Any new plans to take away states' freedom to use land as they see fit must be stopped.

That's why I sponsored an amendment to block Mr. Obama from declaring any of the 14 lands listed in the memo as "monuments." Unfortunately, the Senate, led by Democrats, rejected it on Thursday evening by a vote of 58-38.

It was particularly disappointing that the Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, of Nevada, voted against the amendment. The government owns more than 80 percent of the land in Nevada and the unemployment rate there is 12.8 percent. Surely it would help job prospects if more land were open for business.

This is a nationwide problem. The government currently owns 650 million acres, or 29 percent of the nation's total land.

Federal bureaucrats shouldn't be wasting time thinking up ways to acquire more, especially in the middle of a recession. Taking the nation's resources offline will stifle job creation and dry up tax revenues.

If anything, the government should be selling land off, not locking more up. By voting against my amendment, the Democrats tacitly endorsed Mr. Obama's secret plan to close off millions more acres to commerce.

If enacted, the plan would mean fewer jobs for Americans.

The Democratic Congress refused to stop it, but one sure way Americans could help block it is if they decide some Democrats should lose their jobs on November.

Sen. Jim DeMint, South Carolina Republican, is chairman of the U.S. Senate Steering Committee, a caucus of conservative senators.



"Daily Motivations"

"We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop." -- Mother Teresa

Using love as the power for change, you open to the ever-present grace, power, creativity, and acceptance within. -- Vicky Thompson

"Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive." -- Scott Adams



"Daily Devotions" (KJV and/or NLT)

If you need wisdom---if you want to know what God wants you to do---ask Him, and He will gladly tell you. He will not resent your asking. (James 1:5)

Because God's Spirit resides within us, we can rely on Him as our Teacher, Counselor, and Guide into all truth. He is willing to share His great knowledge with us.

God is never surprised when we have problems, and He is always with us to help us. But believers often deprive themselves of God's solutions because they do not take time to study His Word. Or they may know the Word but not want to obey it or meet the conditions of God's promises. Thus they do not receive full benefit from God's omniscience.

God's help does not guarantee us a life free of trials and tribulations. In fact, God uses our adversity, heartache, testings, and persecutions to bless us.

Furthermore, trusting God does not eliminate temptation. But, in 1 Corinthians 10:13, Paul says that God "...will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand." When we accept the fact that the God, who knows the end from the beginning, also knows the way out, we can relax. He has the power and wisdom to make us victorious.

God knows everything about you and loves you unconditionally. I encourage you---yes, I plead with you---to open your heart to Him and determine to walk with Him regardless of the cost.

Remind yourself every day of the truth that God knows everything. You will never again feel the same way about your daily personal fellowship with Him.

Your View of God Really Matters …

Do you sometimes lack enough faith to believe that God will make clear what He wants you to do? Write down James 1:5 on a note card and keep it in your pocket. Read it every day until it is ingrained on your heart. Then see whether or not God is keeps His Word.



"The Patriot Post"

Man is not free unless government is limited.... As government expands, liberty contracts. -- Ronald Reagan

The highest glory of the American Revolution was this; it connected, in one indissoluble bond the principles of civil government with the principles of Christianity. -- John Quincy Adams

No good government but what is republican... the very definition of a republic is 'an empire of laws, and not of men.' -- John Adams



Dezinformatsia

Whose money is it? "[T]he Bush tax cuts are the single largest part of the black hole that is the federal budget deficit." --Newsweak editor Fareed Zakaria

Obama's national security theater: "Let us talk about Dick Cheney and the point that he seems to be trying to make ... is that ... the Obama administration, is not taking terrorism seriously enough. Is this theater or is there a real point to be made?" --CBS's Harry Smith

Now they ask? "[D]on't you think when the former vice president says America is weaker than it has been that [he is] giving aid and comfort to the enemy, that [he is] encouraging another attack?" --Fox's Geraldo Rivera

Good riddance: "'End of an era. The last Kennedy in Congress calling it quits.' ... It was 1946 when [Patrick's] uncle John Fitzgerald Kennedy was elected to the House. Then, his uncle, Senator Robert Kennedy, and then his father, Ted. There has always been a Kennedy in Washington." --ABC's Diane Sawyer

Alpha Jackass: "The whole of the anger-at-government movement is predicated on this: Times are tough, the future is confusing, the threat from those who would dismantle our way of life is real, as if we weren't to some extent doing it for them now. And the president's black. But you can't come out and say that's why you're scared. ... And so this is where the euphemisms come in. But taxes haven't gone up, the budget deficit is from the last administration's adventurous war, grandma is much more likely to be death-paneled by your insurance company, and a socialist president would be the one who tried to buy as many voters as possible with stupid tax cuts." --MSNBC's Keith Olbermann

The media have done their job: "While the president is showing signs of vulnerability on his handling of the economy -- a majority say he has yet to offer a clear plan for creating jobs -- Americans blame former President George W. Bush, Wall Street and Congress much more than they do Mr. Obama for the nation's economic problems and the budget deficit, the poll found. They credit Mr. Obama more than Republicans with making an effort at bipartisanship, and they back the White House's policies on a variety of disputed issues, from allowing gays to serve openly in the military to repealing the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy." --New York Times' political reporter Adam Nagourney



Village Idiots

Vigor or ... whatever: "At the end of the day, wherever [Khalid Sheikh Mohammed] is tried, in whatever forum, what we have to ensure is that it's done as transparently as possible and with adherence to all the rules. If we do that, I'm not sure the location or even the forum is as important as what the world sees in that proceeding." --Attorney General Eric Holder

What happened to "Dissent is patriotic"? "Politically motivated criticism and unfounded fear-mongering only serve the goals of al-Qa'ida. ... Terrorists are not 100-feet tall. Nor do they deserve the abject fear they seek to instill. ... [P]olitics should never get in the way of national security. But too many in Washington are now misrepresenting the facts to score political points, instead of coming together to keep us safe." --Assistant to the president and Deputy National Security Advisor for Homeland Security and Counterterrorism John Brennan

Nothing gets by her: "We see that the government of Iran -- the supreme leader, the president, the parliament -- is being supplanted and that Iran is moving toward a military dictatorship. You know, that is our view." --Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, sharp as a marble

They say the debate is over: "To deny what scientists or scientific evidence is showing, is inappropriate. And as I said earlier, to me ... it's unpatriotic." --Bill Nye the Science Guy on global warming and blizzards

But on the other hand: "I don't believe the vast majority of climate scientists think [the debate is over]. This is not my view." --Phil Jones, director of the Climatic Research Unit at the University of East Anglia and the central figure in ClimateGate

"For the longest time, every Republican election has been based on some sentimental bulls--t: the flag, or the flag pin, or the Pledge, or the, 'It's morning in America.' ... Yes, yes, the love of our troops, the ultimate in fake patriotism. Are you kidding? The troops, we pay them like s--t, we f--k them and trick them on deployment, we nickel and dime them on medical care when they get home, not to mention the stupid wars that we send them to. Yeah, we love the troops the way Michael Vick loves dogs." --HBO's Bill Maher



Short Cuts

"How much time, do you suppose, has Eric Holder spent as attorney general of the United States explaining that he meant no harm by all the harm he's done?" --columnist Paul Greenberg

"Our government can't even resolve confusion about George Washington's birthday. How could it possibly improve our health care system?" --columnist Tom Purcell

"The bottom line on Obama: He puts our money where his mouth is." --CNS News editor Terence Jeffrey

"If global warming gets any worse I'm going to have to buy a snowmobile." --political analyst Rich Galen

"The Weather Channel reported snow on the ground in forty-nine states Friday for the first time ever. It's a winter nobody will forget. Al Gore won the Nobel Peace Prize for his book on global warming and now it's up for the Pulitzer Prize in Fiction." --comedian Argus Hamilton



"The Web"

Truth...........from a man the media has never been able to throw dirt on..amazing!! He has certainly hit the "world" on the head!!

http://www.sodahead.com/united-states/bill-grahams-prayer-for-our-nation/blog-131625/

Billy Graham's Prayer For Our Nation

THIS MAN SURE HAS A GOOD VIEW OF WHAT'S HAPPENING TO OUR COUNTRY!

'Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values. We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery. We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.. We have killed our unborn and called it choice. We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable. We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem. We have abused power and called it politics.. We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition. We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression. We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment. Search us, Oh God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every sin and Set us free. Amen!'

Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on his radio program, 'The Rest of the Story,' and received a larger response to this program than any other he has ever aired. With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep over our nation and wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again can be called 'One nation under God..'



Morning Bell: Dead Legislation Walking

http://blog.heritage.org/2010/03/09/morning-bell-dead-legislation-walking/?utm_source=Newsletter&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=Morning%2BBell

Another day, another stream of health care fantasy from the White House. A quick look at two health care events from yesterday, one in Glenside, Pennsylvania, and the other in Tawas City, Michigan, clearly exposes the yawing gap between the Obama administration’s health care rhetoric and cold hard legislative reality. First in Glenside, President Barack Obama turned up the volume on his already tired “final push” for health care reform. In addition to the usual litany of false claims about the legislation in Congress (in fact, you don’t get to keep your doctor, it isn’t paid for, it doesn’t reduce costs) President Obama also repeated his new line from his doctors-in-lab-coats address last week:

We have now incorporated almost every single serious idea from across the political spectrum about how to contain the rising cost of health care … Our cost-cutting measures mirror most of the proposals in the current Senate bill…

But, as we pointed out last week, there is one not-so-minor difference between the Senate bill and the President’s new proposal: the Senate bill actually exists. Now, Democrats may be telling their conservative counterparts that they will have reconciliation legislative text in front of the Budget Committee by tomorrow, but don’t hold your breath. The “fixes” that the White House is promising wavering House Democrats they will make all sound easy at first glance: 1) scaling back the tax on high-end health insurance policies; 2) closing the Medicare D loophole; 3) boosting insurance subsidies; 4) increasing Medicaid payments; and 5) fixing the Cornhusker Kickback. But when you take a second look, you see that all of these “fixes” will cost more money. Just look at the Cornhusker Kickback which the President chose to address, not by taking away Nebraska’s special Medicaid payments, but by extending those extra Medicaid payments to every state! Every single item in the President’s proposal either increases spending or reduces new revenues. And he didn’t put forward any way to pay for them. If passing health reform were as easy as giving away free candy, Obamacare would be law already. Finding a way to pay for all these fixes is going to be just as difficult as every earlier effort to pay for this bill. So don’t expect any solutions anytime soon.

And we haven’t even mentioned “abortion” yet, which brings us to Tawas City where Rep. Bart Stupak (D-MI) hosted his own health care townhall. Now the Associated Press headline may read “Stupak: Health bill abortion fight can be resolved” but then the AP actually reports “Rep. Bart Stupak said he expects to resume talks with House leaders this week…” In other words, there is no agreement yet. And what kind of timeline is Stupak looking at for such an agreement? WJRT reports: “[Stupak]’s confident a bill will pass sometime this year.” “Sometime this year” is a bit longer of a timeframe than the White House deadline of next Thursday. But even more importantly, look at the process Stupak suggests for final passage: “According Stupak, until the House and the Senate bills and the president’s proposals become one piece of legislation, health care will remain in limbo.” Considering that everyone agrees that abortion cannot be fixed in reconciliation, Stupak’s position is a total rejection of the White House’s current plan to have the House pass the Senate bill now on the promise that the Senate might come back and try and fix it sometime in the future. Stupak clearly wants “one piece of legislation,” and the only way to accomplish that is to scrap the current Senate bill and start over.

In the meantime, legislative “limbo” has not been kind to the Senate bill. Every day seems to bring news of yet another yes vote switching to undecided or no vote. Just yesterday, former-yes votes Reps. Michael Arcuri (D-NY), Dan Maffei (D-NY), Bill Owens (D-NY) and Dan Lipinski (D-IL) all confirmed they were either now undecided or would vote no. And Rep. Artur Davis (D-AL), who voted no the first time, said he would suspend his campaign for Governor just so he could come back to Washington to vote against Obamacare again. The President can travel the country talking about an up-or-down vote for “our proposal” all he wants, but the reality is he simply doesn’t have the votes in the House for the only piece of health care legislation that actually exists.



Now, I Definitely Want A Job In Government

by Veronique de Rugy

http://biggovernment.com/vderugy/2010/03/08/now-i-definitely-want-a-job-in-government/

Study this USA Today chart and cry:

According to USA Today:

“Overall, federal workers earned an average salary of $67,691 in 2008 for occupations that exist both in government and the private sector, according to Bureau of Labor Statistics data. The average pay for the same mix of jobs in the private sector was $60,046 in 2008, the most recent data available.”

And let’s just add insult to injury:

“These salary figures do not include the value of health, pension and other benefits, which averaged $40,785 per federal employee in 2008 vs. $9,882 per private worker, according to the Bureau of Economic Analysis.”

So now when you put your kids to bed and they tell you that when they grow up they want to be a doctor and a veterinarian, your answer should be: “Honey, these are all great choices, but what you really want to be is a bureaucrat.”



Harassed by the U.S. Census: A Friend Tells Her Frightening Story; Plus Important Video

By Debbie Schlussel

A good friend of mine had the misfortune of experiencing an important–and scary–preview of what might face you, this year, as Census workers try to pry information from you beyond what is required by the U.S. Constitution.

Last summer, my friend was selected for the “pilot program” for the U.S. Census and tells me the frightening story of how U.S. Census workers repeatedly harassed her because she refused to fill out the ten-page questionnaire (which asked detailed, intrusive questions about her insurance, her kids’ schooling, how it was paid for and how they were transported there, etc.). Because she refused to fill out the form, a census worker visited her home over ten times, trying to threaten her into filling out the form. The census worker even put a copy of “the law” in her mailbox, with something about being prosecuted highlighted. The census worker told my friend that her participation was necessary to determine government social services, to which my friend replied that she doesn’t depend on the government and that they should pry into the lives of those who take welfare checks.

My friend, a teacher, wondered how a tiny requirement in the U.S. Constitution, requiring a count of American residents, resulted in Big Brother government suddenly demanding detailed personal information about her family. My friend repeatedly told the census worker, “We have four people in our household. That’s all I’m required to tell you, and that’s all you need to know.” Unfortunately, shortly after that, my friend and her husband were audited by the IRS over an alleged discrepancy of $150. Here’s more from my friend:

I was sent the census “pilot” form, this summer, It was very long and intrusive. It asked personal questions about where and how my kids got to school. When I refused to fill it out, I was relentlessly harassed by a census worker. Her name was Carol Emory and she threatened me with prosecution after she attempted to tell me what the Constitution said. I told her that I was a U.S. History teacher and knew exactly what it said. I also told her that I was a member of the NRA and not to come back to my house!

More people need to know that their rights are being violated.

In case you don’t know, here’s all the U.S. Constitution says about the Census, in Article I, Section 2:

The actual Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct.

That’s it. That’s all it says, and that’s in a section about how Representatives to Congress are apportioned. There is nothing there about how many toilets you have or how your kids get to school. It’s no-one’s business . . . especially not the government’s.



ID Card for Workers Is at Center of Immigration Plan

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703954904575110124037066854.html?mod=WSJ_hpp_MIDDLENexttoWhatsNewsThird

Getty Images

Customs and Border Protection agent Jesus Gomez checks a passport at the vehicle crossing at the San Ysidro Port of Entry in California.

Lawmakers working to craft a new comprehensive immigration bill have settled on a way to prevent employers from hiring illegal immigrants: a national biometric identification card all American workers would eventually be required to obtain.

News Hub: Worker ID Card Spurs Controversy

Lawmakers working to craft a new comprehensive immigration bill are proposing a new national biometric ID card that would be required of all U.S. workers. WSJ's Laura Meckler explains the proposal and the objections from privacy advocates.

Under the potentially controversial plan still taking shape in the Senate, all legal U.S. workers, including citizens and immigrants, would be issued an ID card with embedded information, such as fingerprints, to tie the card to the worker.

The ID card plan is one of several steps advocates of an immigration overhaul are taking to address concerns that have defeated similar bills in the past.

The uphill effort to pass a bill is being led by Sens. Chuck Schumer (D., N.Y.) and Lindsey Graham (R., S.C.), who plan to meet with President Barack Obama as soon as this week to update him on their work. An administration official said the White House had no position on the biometric card.

"It's the nub of solving the immigration dilemma politically speaking," Mr. Schumer said in an interview. The card, he said, would directly answer concerns that after legislation is signed, another wave of illegal immigrants would arrive. "If you say they can't get a job when they come here, you'll stop it."

Revolving Door: Immigration Legislation

View Interactive

See attempts at reform and statistics on immigrants removed from the U.S. over the past six decades.

Journal Community

The biggest objections to the biometric cards may come from privacy advocates, who fear they would become de facto national ID cards that enable the government to track citizens.

"It is fundamentally a massive invasion of people's privacy," said Chris Calabrese, legislative counsel for the American Civil Liberties Union. "We're not only talking about fingerprinting every American, treating ordinary Americans like criminals in order to work. We're also talking about a card that would quickly spread from work to voting to travel to pretty much every aspect of American life that requires identification."

Mr. Graham says he respects those concerns but disagrees. "We've all got Social Security cards," he said. "They're just easily tampered with. Make them tamper-proof. That's all I'm saying."

U.S. employers now have the option of using an online system called E-Verify to check whether potential employees are in the U.S. legally. Many Republicans have pressed to make the system mandatory. But others, including Mr. Schumer, complain that the existing system is ineffective.

Last year, White House aides said they expected to push immigration legislation in 2010. But with health care and unemployment dominating his attention, the president has given little indication the issue is a priority.

Rather, Mr. Obama has said he wanted to see bipartisan support in Congress first. So far, Mr. Graham is the only Republican to voice interest publicly, and he wants at least one other GOP co-sponsor to launch the effort.

An immigration overhaul has long proven a complicated political task. The Latino community is pressing for action and will be angry if it is put off again. But many Americans oppose any measure that resembles amnesty for people who came here illegally.

Under the legislation envisioned by Messrs. Graham and Schumer, the estimated 10.8 million people living illegally in the U.S. would be offered a path to citizenship, though they would have to register, pay taxes, pay a fine and wait in line. A guest-worker program would let a set number of new foreigners come to the U.S. legally to work.

Most European countries require citizens and foreigners to carry ID cards. The U.K. had been a holdout, but in the early 2000s it considered national cards as a way to stop identify fraud, protect against terrorism and help stop illegal foreign workers. Amid worries about the cost and complaints that the cards infringe on personal privacy, the government said it would make them voluntary for British citizens. They are required for foreign workers and students, and so far about 130,000 cards have been issued.

Mr. Schumer first suggested a biometric-based employer-verification system last summer. Since then, the idea has gained currency and is now a centerpiece of the legislation being developed, aides said.

A person familiar with the legislative planning said the biometric data would likely be either fingerprints or a scan of the veins in the top of the hand. It would be required of all workers, including teenagers, but would be phased in, with current workers needing to obtain the card only when they next changed jobs, the person said.

The card requirement also would be phased in among employers, beginning with industries that typically rely on illegal-immigrant labor.

The U.S. Chamber of Commerce doesn't have a position on the proposal, but it is concerned that employers would find it expensive and complicated to properly check the biometrics.

Mr. Schumer said employers would be able to buy a scanner to check the IDs for as much as $800. Small employers, he said, could take their applicants to a government office to like the Department of Motor Vehicles and have their hands scanned there.

—Alistair MacDonald contributed to this article.



"The e-mail Bag"

Nancy Pelosi and Father O'Malley

Father O'Malley rose from his bed. It was a fine spring day in his new Washington, D.C. parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of air and to see the beautiful day outside.

He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. He promptly made a phone call. The conversation went like this:

"Good morning. This is Speaker Pelosi. How might I help you?"

"And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O'Malley at St.Brigid's. There's a jackass lying dead in me front lawn. Would ye be so kind as to send a couple o'yer lads to take care of the matter?"

Speaker Pelosi, considering herself to be quite a wit, replied, "Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of last rites!"

There was silence on the line for a moment, and Father O'Malley replied:

"Aye, that's certainly true, but we are also obliged to first notify the next of kin."

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